Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
