I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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