I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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