I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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