You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The air was thick with penises
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
