It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize