i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
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