Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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