what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
