Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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