he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize