I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i will never coherently bang her
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
