guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
