I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
