I love black thongs
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
