i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
