don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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