We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
