The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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