I skipped work to stalk him.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
His nipple licking is glorious
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