we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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