I murdered the dance floor call the cops
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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