Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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