I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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