i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
