he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
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