Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
