were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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