So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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