Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
