First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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