Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
