Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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