Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
