I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
