you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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