just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
so much tequila, so little girl.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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