If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
