can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
