I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
