Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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