On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
