if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
