There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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