Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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