so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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