and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
