Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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