im gay
i know
yea but for you.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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