In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
