is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
